Cranium Conundrum

Being 20-something is the most confusing thing that will happen to you. I've looked back and learnt what I don't want to be. I look at the future and there are so many things that I want to be. All knowing still clueless. Right now, I'm happy. Personally, I couldn't be happier. But the moment I begin considering the happiness in context of just me -- removed from other people, love etc -- it begins to irk. Gnaw.

1. Whenever I’m 100% happy, I fight with ma. Like yesterday.

2. I want to write a book. A bestseller.

3. I want to do a Master’s in Literature/Media & Cultural Studies.

4. But like million others I choose security over passion and head out to write my SOP for Master’s in Labor Relations.

5. I have irritably overactive hormones. I currently like 4 guys.

6. I also own a mature head. No hook-ups/knock-ups, you see :)

7. Weight comes to me like opposite poles of a magnet. And yet I continue to drink piping hot Bournvita every single day. WITHOUT any guilt. Just ‘cuz I really love it. So much so, that I’d choose my cup of hot chocolate over any of the aforementioned 4 boys.

8. I want to achieve world peace. In my attempt to do my bit, I signed up with ivolunteer. But lady luck denied me once again. They rejected my application stating that 24 is the min. age. Ha. Come 2011, I’ll get them.

9. I don’t wanna get married. Period. Don’t ask me why.

10. Next time somebody comes up to me and tells me that I’m doing just fine. And brand Weep-Ro is good. And wait for things to fall in place bla bla bla, I swear to God, I'll slap her/him so hard that s/he will bleed.

11. I’ve learnt that sometimes people you've never met can re-teach you principles that you’ve stood by all your life but have somehow forgotten—all over a gtalk chat. ‘Money is not the metric for everything.. at least not the metric for success’ Yeah, you know who you are. Hugs >:D<

12. I’ve been drunk, except not the way I wanted. I want to get sloshed. BAD. I want an epic hangover. And now that I’m losing my way, I also want to smoke weed. A FULL JOINT.

13. I don’t like the way a couple of other 22 year olds are sorted. Ok, they aren’t sorted. But they’ve a clearly chalked out plan. They are focused on what they want. But I know that’s not true. Nobody wants a fuckin’ MBA degree from a fancy college. They’re just doing it for the money. Like it or not people, I’m better than you. At least I’m not fooling myself. Gaah. But I guess, in the end, they are better off. Turns out, you either do what you like or get paid. Bummer.

14. But that doesn’t mean I’m fickle minded. That just means I want to achieve different thingS. Yes, all this in this one single life.

15. I’ve achieved quite a few things in life. But I envy those who have achieved more. But shouldn’t it be just about me and not comparing me with others?

16. ‘You don’t look for love. It just happens.' However bloody clichéd that sounds, it’s annoyingly true.

17. I don’t like my nose. It’s big. And looks like a freshly fried pakoda.

18. I hate people who don’t vote. Register for your voting cards losers. It takes 10 minutes online. Vote. Or shut up. Next time I hear you complain of anything other than reservation/taxes, you will receive a nice verbal lashing from me. And yes, it applies to some of my close friends as well. It pisses me off but I love you too much to fight with you.

19. I’m losing control over my own life. And the feeling is threatening. VERY. But I’m not scared. When the going gets tough… and Kiran Ma’m had once told me that she wanted her daughter, if and whenever she is born, to grow up like me. To be a fighter :). Happiest moment! Well there you go lady luck, up yours. I’m not giving up. Ever. Btw, Kiran Ma’m, I love you. You’re 1 amongst the 2 teachers I look up to. And your compliment will forever remain the best, most loved and most treasured. You were the first one to have invested faith in my capabilities. Even before my parents. What are the chances, but if you are reading this, THANK YOU :)

20. Reading keeps me very happy. I whine after every random clothes/accessories/perfume purchase. But after every book purchase, you’ll see me smiling. BEAMING. :)

21. Did I mention that I also want to study Religious Studies? Just out of love for learning.

22. I hate people who divide India into two. Oh so you are a North Indian? Well yes Brad Pitt, I’m an Indian alright, which street of Asshole Avenue are you staying in?

Boss is acting like an absolute Hitler. And Weep-Ro has the worst HR policies in the whole god-damn world. You get the point.

PS: Kiran Ma'm was blessed with a boy. Argh.The conspiracy.

Pic Courtsey: www.danschmoyer.com